I believe that in every mother there’s the mama-bear inside. It doesn’t matter what you think your spirit animal is, when it comes to protecting what is valuable/precious to us the bear inside comes out. And a mama-bear will not give up that easily, will put her life in the line.
Why a Mama-Bear
The term mama-bear resonated with me so strongly, after all, I consider myself quite ferocious when protecting my beloved ones. Tell me a mother who doesn’t become as ferocious as a bear when protecting her little ones?
Our children are our own flesh and blood, a part of us goes with them when we give them birth. We spend nine months nurturing them inside us, feeling them like if we were one.
Of course there’re exceptions with everything and not all mothers respond as such, but to a true mother I can assure she would.
I want to believe that any mother who truly loves her children would walk through hell if she had to protect them.
It’s called unconditional love, a love that goes beyond life itself.
But apparently for some can feel like an exaggerated statement. I had people telling me that their children are not the centre of their lives. That they were tired of listening to people telling them children are a mother’s priority.
Let me tell you that I think they are at the same time right and wrong. But let’s focus first on how it’s perceived on the internet.
Now, checking on a google search most descriptions were correct yet there was some saying a synonym that didn’t sound good. I also believe that is not accurate: helicopter parent.
Helicopter Parent vs Mama-Bear
So what is a helicopter parent? Based on what wiktionary says:
- A parent who pays an inordinate amount of attention to their children and often makes decisions, particularly educational ones, normally the province of the student.
I can somewhat understand that some too overprotecting mothers can be helicopter mothers. I also believe there’s so many mothers out there (and not mothers) that like bad mouthing about mothers, specially new ones. And the reason is normally because they feel entitled in doing so.
This is a problem (bitching and unwanted advice) that I believe is probably the number one cause for mothers to feel not so good about their parenting skills and/or confidence.
If new mothers had the support and guidance when needed, they wouldn’t struggle as much as they do! Children would have a stronger support and community which would reinforce their confidence and feeling of security.
My perception of a mama-bear is a mother that is strong inside. She protects her children from any harm or threat, yet will give them the space to build their confidence and learning by themselves or with a little of guidance.
They let their little ones to satiate their curiosity by exploring within safe grounds and with the trust. They are observing parents, always watching out for their kids yet they live life to the fullest.
These mothers are assertive and confident enough to pursue their own happiness, working it within their family’s life.
Getting back to the mothers “That were tired of listening to people telling them children are a mother’s priority”. As a I said they are both wrong and right.
It is true that is a tiring job to be a mother, and nobody should tell them what to do or not. Yet it’s also true that when you become a mother, you have a big responsibility in your hands.
The moment you decided to become a mother, to have this child, you decided to take on this priority.
I think people are not regarded enough about the dramatic life change that having children carries. The first years those little humans rely on you full time, so much that your life revolves around them.
BUT. You can still live your life within that new type of lifestyle, as long as you provide them the basics that they need to grow as amazing adults.
Those basics they need are:
- PROTECTION and SAFETY
- UNDERSTANDING and LISTENING
A mama-bear life project
I hope this Blog will help you, MAMA, to grow not only as a mother but as your best self. I believe that the best gift a mother can ever give to their children is ALL THEIR BEST as an individual.
Also of course all the basics I mentioned above!
Remember that me, you and other mothers of our present are shaping the FUTURE through our children. They are the society of TOMORROW.
If we want to provide them a better future, we need to give them OUR best TODAY. To let the Mama-Bear inside free and SHINE in Motherhood.
With light and joy,
Diosa Ll. B.