Mindset

Cut anxiety off with this four points system


I’ve been offline for a while, and it has been very hard for my family and me, especially for me.

All started when we went on holidays to North Wales (at the beginning of August) and just on the last days we all fell ill one by one like flies!

First was my mother in law; then a day after was my husband and my father in law, then a few days after it was me and then our son.

My husband recovered in a few days (very quick!), and he suspects that the cod liver oil supplements he’s taking helped with his fast recovery… Unfortunately, our son suffered the most with very high fever, and we were sent to the emergency by the clinician that was checking him up.

It was terrifying and looking at his poor state made me cry on our way to the hospital.

Thankfully his blood test came clear, and the nurses managed to bring his temperature and heartbeat down, and we were sent home after a few hours.

The following days were chaos as I was still ill, my son was very clingy and needy that I was cluster feeding at night too!
I wasn’t able to do any work because I couldn’t focus because of sleep deprivation and low energy levels (and my son’s neediness).
The house was not super tidy, but it didn’t go worse. I’m lucky that my husband did all the shopping and kept sorting out the dishes and the laundry.
This experience has challenged me in many ways and taught me many things that I want to share with you, hoping it’ll help you too.

It’s essential always to be kind to yourself (especially facing challenges) and despite the frustration, to not to lose sight of what matters most.

1. Keep in mind your priorities

It’s easy to look around and get overwhelmed with the amount of work that needs to be tackled and done.

By the way, I’ve got another post talking about how to spot signs of being Overwhelmed that you might be interested in reading it! Click here to go to the article (opens a new window).

Before you panic and go into “I need to go and have a break” mode make a list of all the things you believe needs priority over other things.

It doesn’t matter the order (yet), write everything you remember what needs to be done and have a look around for any more you haven’t thought of straight away.
When you finish writing, take your time to check the list and then write a number for each (with number one being the top priority).
For me, it was easy; attending my son was first and second was to take care of my health. Next was to prepare and cook meals for all.
Also, it helped if I would write in my journal for at least fifteen minutes.

It’s essential to put some order in our head by writing them down, and sometimes we need to be reminded of what we truly care the most.

The rest can be done another day when everything has settled into normal!

2. Brain dumping

I was sick and not functioning correctly, full of anxiety and frustration because I had to put my business on hold.

My teeth would hurt as I clench them in my sleep, waking up  with tension the day after.

I would also lash out to my beloved ones around me! My poor son would cling on me even more than before.

After ranting and or raising my voice, I would feel incredibly guilty for being such a cow. I would even say to myself I was a horrible mother or wife.

These are the first steps to spiralling into a vicious cycle that anxiety and overwhelm is.

From experience I’ve seen the effectiveness of journaling. You can dump all your feelings into a piece of paper rather than throwing them at people you care most.

Keeping thoughts to ourselves that aren’t useful nor helpful is not only a good idea but a risky one: they’ll slowly build up and eat us inside.

By writing our frustrations and negative emotions is a way of disposing them somewhere else. That way won’t hurt anybody in the process.

You end up with a calm and neutral state of mind, and your senses feel more balanced.

Call it like your ready-to-go, efficient and available therapist!

3. Top up your Positivity

If Journaling is the release of emotions, thoughts or ideas, then we are left in a state of calmness or a neutral position.

It’s good for feeling calm and balanced, but it doesn’t hurt to add some backup to keep this feeling longer or raise it to a higher emotional level.

You might have heard of Affirmations, and if not, they are phrases that shape your perception of yourself. These phrases might exist already so you are reinforcing them or they might be new ones that you want to acquire.

They are written in present or present continuous as they work more efficiently if we assume that it’s already happening (even though they might not be!).

Call it Brainwashing but if it’s for a useful purpose that will help you then let it be!

Examples are: “I’m healthy and happy”, “My body heals fast and efficiently so I can live my life to the fullest”…

What is it that you want today or to achieve in a few days? How do you want to feel?

Ask yourself these questions, write them down, and repeat them at least five times each, EVERY DAY.

If you want to learn more about Positivity I’ve got an article called Positive Mindset Growth Tips that you might like to have a look at! Click here to go to the article (opens in a new wi.ndow)

4. HABITS are FOREVER

Repetition. Consistency. Persistence. They mean the same thing: Naturalisation.

If you want something to become effortless, then these are the words you are looking for!

How to make something natural and effortless? HABIT.

Habits are powerful, but also you get to have bad habits too, so it’s crucial that when we get rid of one we replace them for a favourable replacement.

Let’s say in this case; you tend to feel anxious when things go wrong.

Affirmations are great because not only you can stop the process of getting into an anxious mode, but you can create a new system in place that elevates your mood instead!

To give you an example that you can apply today (Bonus!), next time you start feeling anxious or stressed stop on that moment what you are doing (if it’s safe to do so) and concentrate on inhaling and exhaling.

The “deep breathing” will help you stop your mind building up thoughts that lead to stress as you focus on each air fluctuation.

Then after half a minute or so (whatever time needed to feel calmer), you start repeating an affirmation that will help you with this type of situations.

“Everything is all right because I’m capable of sorting things out efficiently and on time!”

This affirmation, in particular, gives you peace of mind because when you achieve it as truth (to believe it). It will make you more confident with whatever you have to deal with in the future it’ll be done and on time.

REMEMBER

It takes time to get all the points above done, but again, everything that matters takes time!
We live in a society that it’s fast-paced, where we want things quick, and people that are so impatient become easily frustrated or anxious.

Know that as long as you believe everything is achievable on their own time, you will have peace of mind.

Assertiveness is within us; if we acknowledge it, everything else will fall into place, and life will suddenly become more comfortable!

With light and Joy,

Diosa Ll.B.

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